Running Gave Me this Life

It might be too much to say running saved my life. I know it has been a literal lifesaver for many runners out there. For me, it is enough to say that running gave me the life I have.

It helped forge me into the person I am.

It has made me resilient.
It has made me strong.
It has made me appreciate failure.
It has made me brave.
It has made me compassionate.
It has made me analytical.
It has made me prioritize.
It has made me face truths.
It has made me more sociable.
It has made me determined.
It has made me focused.
It has made me grateful.
It has made me insightful.
It has made me humble.
It has made me joyful.

Running changed the way I think and helped me shed societal expectations for my body.

Running showed me over and over what I am capable of.

Running gave meaning to the corny cliches about pressure and diamonds and self-determination.

Running did not save my life, but I would not be who I am today without it, and I love what it has helped shape me into.

As I write this, on the eve of surgery, I am looking back at old posts and remembering why I am doing this. Why it's worth it. I will never be a competitive, elite runner, but I am not whole without running. I am not truly myself without it.

Last week, I was getting cold feet about the surgery. I've been numb the past couple months, as this process has dragged on. I wondered, Do I even miss running enough to undergo surgery to get it back?

This week, I know. I have not felt like myself since February, when my running had to be drastically cut back. I have felt strangely hollow and half-there. I am ready to feel alive again.

I am so ready.

ABK

Various Updates

Running

A couple weeks ago, I went back to see my doctor and schedule my fasciotomy. Not only has my calf pain been back, but the mental and emotional anguish of being injured has been weighing heavily on me. Running has been the only exercise that ever worked for me; I believe it played a huge role in making my depression manageable and helping me live a more balanced, happier life.

So I am very much looking forward to surgery at the end of the month. I'm savoring each run right now; after surgery it will be three months before I can be truly back to running the way I like, or think seriously about training.

This month I wrote a post for the Skirt Sports blog about my WORD. A word that motivates me and keeps me moving. I have used transcend as a mantra for ages - it has applied to overcoming pain, doubt, negativity, and fear. These days, it seems even more applicable to life in general.

My post is here. Please give it a read!

I laughed a little at this robot's assessment of my writing skills. Doesn't it know purposeful repetition is an artistic choice?! 

Product Review Update

I've tried out the MIIEGO headphones a couple more times. While they definitely resulted in sweaty ears at the gym, I found this wasn't as uncomfortable as I thought it would be when outside.

The picture on the right shows all the sweat from wearing them to the gym, but after my outdoor runs they're not this sweaty!

The band across the back is still a little too tight and pulls a bit, but otherwise I'm pretty happy with them. I hope the band loosens up a touch with use, because right now my one major complaint is that they slip due to the band wanting to rebound into its twisty shape.

Work

I'm enjoying being back at work. This year we have a third CRT (curriculum resource teacher) and it's been great! The three of us make a really strong team.

We had 78% totality during dismissal on Monday. That was fun!

We moved into a bigger office this year, too, and it's much nicer than the old one. The year has gotten off to a smooth start so far.

Real Life

Last Friday, some friends joined me and Matt for a peaceful march of resistance and reflection, followed by a vigil for Charlottesville and Heather Heyer. It is very hard for me to explain how it feels, as a Jewish woman and an American, to see Nazis brazenly marching in the streets, but gathering with others in hope and love served as a balm for my sore heart and strengthened my resolve to resist.

And seeing the response in Boston? That was perfect.

What is your word?
How have you been dealing with national events lately?

ABK

Runners' Acronyms

My friend and Sub-30 Club founder Ted Spiker wrote an article recently that I just had to participate in. Runners really have their own language, but this is something totally different!

Ted's instructions are to edit the answers to reflect your running life. My answers are below. (The links are references and various Runner's World articles for those who are interested in the acronyms' origins.)

DNS: Did Not Start—No; I've never skipped a race for any reason.
DNF: Did Not Finish—No.
DNRTAL: Did Not Remember To Apply Lube—Oy, yes. The chafing on my bra-line that lasted weeks is a testament to that.
DFL: Dead Freaking Last—Not that I know of!
FFF: Finished Freaking First—Never.
BQ: Boston Qualified—LOL...no.
DQ: Didn’t Quit—Every. Single. Day.

POPOPOP: Pancake on Pancake on Pancake on Pancake—More like WOWOW. Waffle on waffle on waffle...Or COCOCO (cupcake on cupcake on cupcake...)
LYORP: Liked Your Own Race Photo—Yes! I've been lucky enough to have a few good ones.

It's between this one (finishing my first marathon) and the one below (finishing with my marathon PR). How can you not love photos that show the joy and relief of accomplishing such a thing?!

WAMTD: Wore a Medal to Dinner—I've worn a medal to brunch/lunch after a race. But never to dinner.
BTW: Bemoaned the Weather—For sure; about 9 months out of the year, really.

SSP: Shared Shoe Photos—Oh yeah!
TBT: Threw-up By Track—Ha, luckily no!
PR: Personal Record—YES! I'm still basking in joy over my marathon PR last February and my 5k PR in October.
PB: Personal Bartie—Yes! I feel special!

With Bart before the Space Coast Marathon!

CRAP: Certifiably Ruined a Porta-Potty—Haven't we all?
LOL: Leaked On Leg—Although I've tried, I can't seem to pee while in the middle of a run.
OMG: Ordered Many GUs—I've definitely ordered a giant box of Caramel Macchiato Gu from Amazon in the past.

Here's an old picture of Archie guarding my Gu from poachers.

BFF: Blessed with Fast Feet—Some days are more blessed than others.
BRB: Blisters Rubbed Bloody—Luckily no!
WTF: Waddled Through Finish—Not quite.
IDK: Injured Damn Knee—Ugh. Yes. Strengthening my hips and glutes has really helped with that, though.
EAT: Eulogized a Toenail—Yep, and boy was I proud!

I don't think it ever fell off, but it was bruised and nasty until it grew out! Also, how great is the quality on this old photo?!

GPBAJ: Got Passed By a Joggler—Not that I know of!

I'm sure many of you can relate!

Do any of these acronyms apply to you?

ABK

Embracing "Girly" & Discovering Strength

Thanks, Amanda, for hosting TOL.

Teaching middle school serves as a daily reminder that those years are rarely solidly good. When you ask people what the best years of their lives were, does anyone ever say middle school? We wandered the halls hoping not to be noticed - or to be noticed by the right people - unsure of who we really were or if anyone would like us if they knew the real us.

If you were anything like me, you dealt with this anxiety by pretending to be above it all. Middle school is all about masks. I thought I was singularly unattractive and unoriginal, so I went the route of pretending to embrace that, and I forced myself into a kind of tomboy mold.

(I looked for pictures of these years to share with you guys, but I seem to remember avoiding cameras at all costs, and I must have burned all photo evidence of those years. Good thing Britt had this photo to share.)

I wore giant T-shirts and huge, baggy jeans - anything to hide my body. My hair was in a perpetual bun. The only makeup I used was worn to cover acne. When cotillions and dances came along, I wore my pretty dresses and heels with the grace of a newborn giraffe.

I developed a shell. I wanted to be tough, and I wanted people to know I was tough. In doing so, I turned away from all things girly. Even when I began to enjoy "girly" things - the color pink, makeup, dresses, etc - I'd try to be ironic about it.

But over the last few years, I've learned to love being girly. More accurately, I've learned to embrace the complex parts of my personality. I'm tough, yeah, but I'm girly too. Those things aren't mutually exclusive. In fact, over time I've learned that girls - women - are tougher than we let on. We might hide our steel under smooth skin and lipstick, but we're no less strong for our soft exteriors.

Feeling strong and girly at Gasparilla with Kristin.

I've come to realize that accepting who we are and having the courage to reveal every aspect of ourselves is what makes us tough. Hiding behind a tough exterior makes you seem strong, but masks are brittle. They crack. They're not meant to last.

Living as you are and as you want to be...that makes you actually strong. And personally, I don't think there's anything better. When you're strong, you can care for others, show compassion, experience joy, go after a dream, work hard, stand up, fight...

If I can be anything, I want to be strong.

This ended up being a totally different kind of post than I planned. I really wanted to rant about how women can kick butt even in a running skirt. I guess there was more to explore than I thought!

How do you define strength?

Do you consider yourself girly?

Are there any parts of your personality that you aren't comfortable with, or try to hide?

ABK

Personality Revisited

Taking the personality quiz at 16personalities.com satisfied a curiosity I've had for awhile because I'd never done a personality test before and all my friends seemed to know their type and reference is fairly often. (Is that weird?)

It's funny that a week or two after taking the test, and shortly after sharing my post, I saw this post on SciBabe's Facebook page. I watched the video (after sitting through an excruciatingly long commercial for the Squatty Potty) and found it really interesting.

Don't let the name fool you - Yvette d'Entremont is a legit scientist.

The argument is that the MB test is totally pointless. Scientists and psychologists agree that the results tell us very little about what we're actually good at (career-wise) and the methodology is based on pseudoscience.

Having taken the test mostly for fun, this doesn't discourage me. But it does make me wonder about people who take the tests really seriously. And it also made me think of Hanna, who mentioned in her comment on my original post that tests like this determine what we prefer but not really how we act - and if how we act is who we are, then really, preference is a moot point.

I thought this was a fun addition to my self-exploration, so I wanted to share! I still think my type's description was accurate in describing me, but I was never planning to let that type truly define who I am or the actions/careers/decisions in my life, so I guess it was a fun 10 minutes wasted, and now I can go on my merry way!

I know some of you took the test after I posted about it. What are your thoughts?

Do you buy into the MB test, and tests like it?
Do you like science? I always say, if I hadn't gone into English, I would have majored in biology. It's my second love.

ABK

Take That, Taper!

After Tuesday's run sent me into panic-mode, I was excited but also nervous to run Friday. I was really hoping all those mystery pains were just a fluke.

I started with some dynamic warmups and stretches. Then, I began my run at a slow, easy pace. I had a random mix of music playing, and I just concentrated on letting myself warm up. It was chilly and had just finished raining, so the weather was comfortable and clear. I felt good.

The two drops in pace around mile 2 were when my ankle "blipped" a teeny bit. I was able to figure out the cause and still finish strong!

A couple times, I did notice a...blip...in my ankle, but I quickly realized that what was causing it was a kind of "flopping" of my foot; as long as I maintained form, I felt great! So great, in fact, that my "30 minute test run" became five miles and included the bridge. I just didn't want it to end!

I finished feeling like I had showed taper who's boss!

Music of the Night came on toward the end of my run, and I began composing an essay in my head about the symbolism of the Phantom vs. Raoul. I mean really, the entire thing is about innocent, "pure", childlike love versus lust. Which probably isn't news to anyone who's a fan of the musical. Anyway, my thesis was that Christine chose the wrong man at the end, because choosing Raoul shows us that she's stunted due to her father's death and has never fully matured into an adult woman.

But, choosing the Phantom alone would have been all about lust and fulfilling fantasy and desire, without any solid emotional foundations, which would have doomed the relationship. So really, she should have just chosen both and had some brother-husband style polygamy going on. Right?

Taper is literally making me crazy, guys.

Except in this case, it was Phantom of the Opera.

Am I the only one who mentally writes literary essays while running?

Sunday I ran the second 10 miles of Kristin's first 20-miler for my last long run. I changed how I had tied my new shoes so they had a firmer grip on my heels, and it worked like a charm; I didn't have any pain, and it was so rewarding to be there for her through that milestone!

So much for sticking with a 12:30 pace. I'll do better next time!

We celebrated with breakfast at Skillets. Usually I go for the gluten free waffle, but I really wanted to try an omelet this time...which was fine, because Kristin's husband shared some of his waffle with me, so I had the best of both worlds!

I had this huge southwest-style omelet and grits, plus 1/4 of a chocolate-chip pecan waffle. YUM.

After breakfast, Matt and I drove to Cape Coral to check out the race route and parking situation. It's going to be pretty tricky for spectators to meet me on different parts of the course, but we have a week to figure it out so that hopefully I can at least see people a couple times on each loop.

Those blue areas are water, so it's basically impossible to cut through the middle of the course or take a shortcut.

This week, I'm planning two easy, shorter runs. I talked to Megan a little bit about what I should plan this week, and I've decided that three days of rest sounds good, especially because I'll still be up on my feet all week teaching.

(We also have two volleyball games, but that means we only have one practice, which will be easier on my legs and feet since I'm allowed to sit during games if I want, even though I rarely do.)

I'm so excited! I feel like training for my second marathon is finished and was successful! I didn't get injured or sick (fingers crossed...I have 7 days to go)! With that accomplishment under my belt, I feel pretty good about race day! Even if it doesn't go as planned, completing training itself is a pretty big deal.

Speaking of plans...I've already set my pace goals, but here are my other goals, broken down:

A: Break 5:20 (follow my pace goals as outlined in this post)

B: Break 5:30

C: PR (break 5:41)

And of course, finish upright and uninjured, and preferably at a run!

Does your mind go to weird places while you run?
How was your weather this weekend? We've had tons of clouds, wind, and rain, but it's still fairly warm. I've resigned myself to a warm race, and I'm hoping I'll be able to power through.

ABK

It's certain. I will.

At this time last year, I was packing for the Space Coast Marathon. I was full of turkey and pie, but I had eaten in moderation. I had the specter of my first marathon looming over my head; it wasn't necessarily a bad kind of looming, but it was unavoidable.

With BDR just around the corner, I've found myself thinking about how my training last year - and my anticipation of my first marathon - was so vastly different than this year's cycle.

Last year...

...I was in constant awe of myself as I hit new milestones, which I now realize was borne of a tiny seed of self-doubt.

...I surprised myself when I realized I could run twenty miles. That run solidified for me that I could run a marathon, and that I would. In a way, training successfully was the greatest accomplishment; the marathon was big, but getting there was bigger.

...My highest mileage month was 79, and that was during the final month of training; I didn't taper properly because I got sick a couple weeks before race day, so my last long run was that enlightening 20 miles mentioned above.

...The moment of clarity - when I knew I'd definitely complete Space Coast and become a marathoner - was like an explosion bursting; this year's has been a steady, warm candle that refuses to go out.

This year...

...I went into training knowing what I'm capable of and feeling confident I would succeed from day one.

...I didn't feel any doubt. It took me awhile to get into the swing of things, and I leaned pretty heavily on Kristin and my virtual buddies to get me going after Archie passed, but there was never a moment that I thought I wouldn't run BDR.

...My 100 mile month in October gave me the confidence and energy I needed to continue building until taper, and then to taper correctly. I've done two 18-milers and one 20-miler, and I did two of those three very-long-runs alone. (The second 18-miler, which I did with Kristin as part of the Fort Myers Half, was actually closer to 19.7 miles.)

...I know I'm slower, but I'm also more consistent.

...I feel calm and certain.

I do think marathon training changes you. Tackling training for weeks on end, building mileage, conquering fear...it all builds a kind of quiet confidence. I don't feel invincible or superior in any way, but I feel like I know myself. I know how I react under pressure, under stress, when I'm in pain, when I'm doubting myself. And I now know how to handle myself in those situations.

My internal dialogue has changed. "I don't know if I can" has changed to "I will." This shift was subtle and happened in stages, but even in my darkest moments, the feeling of inevitability is there. It's very powerful and cannot be argued with. It's certain. I will.

How has training for long distance races changed you?
What lessons have you learned from running this past year?

ABK

Book Review: "What I Talk About..."

This summer, a student of mine (who's now a junior in high school - how does time fly like that?!) was accepted into an elite summer art program at U. Penn. While she was there, she spent some time browsing used book stores, and in her last week, she stumbled upon Haruki Murakami's memoir What I Talk About When I Talk About Running. She wrote me that she wasn't sure if it was any good, but it made her think of me, and she dropped it off at school during my first week back.

This was kismet! I had literally just added it to my reading list. It seems to be one of those essential reads, like Born To Run and Once A Runner, and I couldn't wait to dive in.

The book, being used, smells like perfume. It makes me wonder about its last owner.

At first, the structure of the memoir threw me off. Murakami doesn't really write linearly, but as I got into the rhythm of his writing, I grew more comfortable with the stream-of-conscious style he seems to employ.

The foreword is titled "Suffering Is Optional"; that's how you know you have a good running book in hand. Runners know better than anyone that growth lies in discomfort, that you have to learn to "embrace the suck", as they say. But living through discomfort doesn't mean suffering. We can transcend pain and choose, in a way, to enjoy it. As Murakami writes: "Pain is inevitable. Suffering is optional."

The memoir meanders through Murakami's life as a new runner, his music choices, and his dalliance with ultramarathons and triathlons. Within these memories, he has scattered little stones of wisdom to be picked up and pocketed. By page 11, I was reading with a pencil in hand so I could underline and annotate.

I won't go through every stone I myself picked up. I'm sure what spoke to me will be different than what speaks to others, but I think that's the beauty of this memoir. Its honesty and simplicity will speak, at times, to any kind of runner.

The strongest reaction I had was to chapter six, wherein Murakami recounts his first ultra at Lake Saroma in Hokkaido, Japan. Murakami's account of how his legs felt during his ultra is how I felt during my marathon! I guess that sheds some light on the difference between us, as if there were any doubt that we're not exactly the same kind of runner.

He writes that he had the desire to run on, but his legs had other ideas, grew "disobedient", and refused to move how he wanted them to. I read that part thinking, Oh, that sounds like mile 21!

He writes of the ultra that, "You'd expect it to afford you a special sort of self-awareness. It should add a few new elements to your inventory in understanding who you are. And as a result, your view of life, its colors and shape, should be transformed. More or less, for better or for worse, this happened to me, and I was transformed."

And I think anyone who has ever run a marathon - or perhaps any race outside the realm of "normal distance", whatever that may be for an individual - can wholeheartedly agree. I came out of the marathon a different person than I was at the start. Somewhere along 26.2 miles, who I was as a runner and a person changed.

That's the beauty of distance running, and Murakami captures that beauty perfectly.

I will say that parts of the book dragged for me, but I think others would find even those parts engaging. This is one I'll pull out to read again, in parts, as I continue my running journey.

Have you read WITAWITAR? (Whew, that's a long title!)
What running book do you recommend I pick up next? I just started Meb for Mortals.


ABK

Things I Tell Myself to Get Out the Door

In order to successfully move my runs to the 4am hour, I had to play mind games with myself. Now that I've gotten into the routine, it's not so bad. Once I'm up, it's easy, and morning runs leave me with a ton of energy throughout the day. I really believe I'm a better teacher on days I wake up early to run.

It amuses me that my long run alarm is set later than my weekday runs.

Still, I have to cajole myself to get out bed. Here are some things I remind myself that I love about morning runs as I'm shuffling around the bedroom like a zombie:

Feeling like I'm the only person in the world. I very rarely see another runner out that early, and if I do, I feel something like 10x more runner-solidarity than at any other time of day.

The bump it gives my runner reputation. I may not be the fastest, but no one can question my dedication.

One of my wake-up buddies, Montana, and I talked about this the other day. It got me thinking about the people who believe in me. I don't want to let them down!

I don't have to worry about what I look like. It's pitch black! Even if someone does see me, they won't be able to tell how gross I am, or if my run is little more than a hunched-over shuffle.

Cool weather. The temperature difference between 4am and evening is 20 degrees, so I love taking advantage of the cooler weather.

I guess "cool weather" is relative, but 77 feels amazing these days!

Minimal accessories! I don't need to worry about a hat or sunglasses; often I don't wear my headphones on a morning run. Everything just gets simplified.

I'll feel unstoppable the rest of the day because I started it with me-time. I spend all day "on stage", talking and interacting with others, being the most perfect version of myself that I can be. Having some alone time first thing in the morning to get my head right is invaluable.

And of course, I love feeling like a super badass because I woke up when the rest of the world was still sleeping!

How do you convince yourself to get going on a tough workout?
Have you noticed more autumnal weather this week?
What do you love about your chosen time-of-day to run/workout?

ABK

What I Hate to Hear from Non-Runners

Running isn't for everyone; I get that. I think it's more important to find a physical activity that makes you happy so you stay consistent and get some exercise than to pick up one particular type of exercise.

Not everyone is going to want to run, and that doesn't have to be justified to me or anyone else. So that's why I can't stand it when people feel the need to justify it, and then spout off something like, "Well, you like running" or "You're good at running" or "Well, you're a runner."

All I can say to that is...not always.

I didn't always like running. I know I've mentioned it here before, but I was legitimately that kid who walked the mile "run" in gym class. These days, I love running in general, but some days I still really, really don't. If you don't want to become a runner, fine, but don't justify it with "You like running, you wouldn't understand" because I was the epitome of a running-hater, so I know that logic doesn't stick.

Sometimes I don't love running for weeks at a time! Getting this reminder in my inbox is always a little hard to swallow.

I wasn't always good at running, and I'd argue that I'm still not very good at it most days. There was a time a couple years ago when I was only running 5k and 10k races, and I was getting speedy. Back then, I felt good at running. These days I feel like every run is a battle. (Must have something to do with 90% humidity.) You don't have to be good at running to enjoy it; is anyone good at Zumba, or weight-lifting, or spin, or...anything else when they first begin? Of course not! But still, people find a way to enjoy the workout even if they're not good at it yet.

And anyway, what does being good at running look like? Are we talking about being good like Meb? Because really, in that case, who is?

I wasn't always a runner. I didn't consider myself a runner when I first started. But like I've already said, you have to start somewhere if you want to achieve something great, and that somewhere isn't going to be at the top.

I think I blame the mile run in gym for people's aversion to running. I mean, coaches never teach you to build up to a mile. Twice a year you just...run it. It's like, Good luck, kids! We're not going to talk about pacing yourself, intervals, or even how far a mile really is! Go get it!

No wonder so many people say they hate running! And as someone who used to, I can't help but think if those people just gave it a chance, they'd be singing a different tune. But hey, to each his own! I just want the lame justifications to stop!

What do you say to these kinds of excuses?

Did you always like to run?

ABK

Semantics

Maybe it's in my nature to over-analyze words and their connotations; I simply can't help it. Given that runners are sometimes a bit sensitive about how things are phrased, I thought clarifying some definitions/debates could benefit us.

This one's a hot topic, isn't it? So many runners get offended when they're called joggers!
As Mark Remy has pointed out, the main difference between a runner and jogger is that joggers are the unluckiest bunch in the world; they're always stumbling over bodies in the woods!

A runner, on the other hand, is anyone who feels a lightness and joy in their heart every time they put on their running shoes and step out the door!

I'll admit, sometimes when we talk about "fueling" I get kind of annoyed. What are we, cars?

If fuel is the good food we put into our bodies in the hopes that it will make us strong and power our runs, then food is all the fun stuff we get to eat afterward!

I honestly hadn't given thought to this until recently. I was reading an article (which I just spent 30 minutes trying to find, with no luck) on Runner's World about a marathoner who is offended by the term "half marathon" because it undermines the race distance.

You know, like, it's not just half a marathon. It's a race all its own; a 13.1 mile race! I can see where he's coming from, but I'm not personally offended by it! What do you think?

The last one kind of connects to this. I have the weirdest pet peeve about distances! "I ran a __" denotes, to me, that you ran a race of that distance.

"I ran 5k" means you ran a training run; "I ran a 5k" means you ran a race. I can't be the only one who gets annoyed by this, can I?!

This was a mindset change that I made purposefully. I was so used to hearing that sometimes we just have bad runs, but that we can learn from them and they make use stronger and tougher...But this mentality didn't work for me. It was too negative.

I've re-framed "bad" runs as "tough" runs. I simply don't believe that bad runs exist, unless you end up injured. And tough runs are valuable; they do make us stronger, better runners in the long run (har har). A good runner can and will learn from a tough run!

What running-related words make you cringe?
 
ABK

I Want...

You know what's sad? When a lack of photo evidence makes me wonder if I have anything of substance to post!

This week's workouts have been therapeutic and necessary. Report card season...Oh how it hurts. Add daylight saving on top of that and you have a recipe for disaster.

Monday I had a great run with Kristin, which helped me put into words quite a few things that have been eating at me. It's great how running does that.

I did T25 on Tuesday, missed my run Wednesday to see an old student (worth it), and rested Thursday (and went to bed before 9pm...again, necessary).

Today I got up early and went to Elizabeth's to do the double T25 workout that Fridays call for. It's amazing how accomplished you feel after getting a hard workout in early. I'm finally feeling normal, so there's a morning run on tomorrow's docket for me.

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I've been thinking a lot lately about things I want. That saying about discipline is true. Discipline is shelving what you want now for what you want most. 

In a world of instant-gratification, it's not an easy thing to ask of ourselves, but it's an important thing. And like anything that's important, sometimes putting it into words and committing ourselves to it (and here it is, folks, my word of the year: dedication!) helps us make it real.

As I was attempting to narrow down my list of "wants" to something truly meaningful, I realized there's just so much to look at. It's hard to narrow it down.

So here it goes.

I want...To make smart decisions in health and fitness that will fuel my running and keep me healthy. I want to be a successful athlete...whatever that means. The first step: Eat right and train right...complete the training for November's scheduled marathon...and run it!

Tuesday post-workout I wanted cookie-fruit-pizza, but chose an apple instead. Progress.

I want...To nurture my friendships so that they don't fall by the wayside when life gets crazy. I want to be the kind of friend people know they can rely on and have fun with. The first step: Set aside time to call people. See nearby friends in person more often. Grab a coffee or a glass of wine. Invite people shopping. Whatever. Be willing to step out of my comfort zone and be more social.

I'm doing my best to stay in touch!

I want...To be more of a risk-taker when it comes to things that really matter to me. The first step: Identify what those things are and figure out an action plan to get there.

I want...To travel. The first step: Start saving some money and figuring out where I really want to go!

So very true.

I want...To write more. The first step: Set aside time everyday to turn off the TV, shelve my phone, and be diligent about writing.

I want...To know I've made a difference in someone's life. The first step: Do my best to truly connect with others and be a valuable person to them. Put real effort into my relationships, both personal and professional.

Notes from students in...2011? (Time flies...I can never remember!)

I want...To be less stressed out, so I can enjoy life more. The first step: Prioritize. By putting first things first and getting the stressful stuff out of the way, there will be more time for fun.

It seems like a lot. But I know my life will be better because of it.

What do you want most?

ABK

I Finally Did It!

I've been planning my running tattoo for well over a year, but it wasn't until Christmas when I started to get really serious about it. Once I decided to get it as a gift, instead of just shelling out the cash for no reason, it was easier to wrap my mind around it.

I wanted a tattoo that could be running-related but would also be relevant otherwise...something that encompassed both my running story and my vision for my life. I wanted something meaningful to me, romantic but not sappy, not trite or overdone. (Can you tell I was a tattoo newbie? If I had known how much of a non-issue it would turn out to be, I don't know if I would have chewed on it for so long.)

Sometime last year, I finally chose a quotation from an essay-turned-song written by Mary Schmich, which I play for my students every year as they prepare to leave the small pond of middle school for the high school ocean. It has always resonated with me; it's a lesson that speaks to the runner in me while also illuminating a much bigger picture.

 A few weeks ago, Kristin (from Ragnar) took me to her tattoo artist so I could check the place out and make an appointment, which we set for March 4.

So, Tuesday rolls around and I'm not the least bit nervous. In fact, all I felt was moderate excitement of the "finally!" kind. I'd been waiting for this for so long that I didn't even really have butterflies! It just felt right.

No, I'm not white-knuckled; my hands were loosely clasped here, I swear.

I was only in the chair for about 15 minutes. Charlie was professional, fast, and efficient. Actually, it didn't hurt at all! (I made the mistake of asking, "Is this it? Is it even in?", a comment which Matt, Kristin, and Charlie found pretty hysterical.)

It's coming along!

This is my first-ever tattoo. It felt like I was being bitten by a mosquito. It only turned into a "bee sting" kind of pain when the needle came close to my bone. Still, I didn't even break a sweat.

All done!

I'm really happy with the results. In a way, I feel like I've had the tattoo forever, maybe because I've been planning it for so long. It doesn't seem like some weird, foreign writing on my body, which I was afraid it might.

Archie approves!

I can't wait for it to heal completely so I can put sunscreen on it and wear tank tops again when I run. For now, it has to stay out of the sun completely, which means it won't make its race debut until April. It will have to be covered for my 5k this weekend.

But I know it will give me an extra boost internally on race day; it will be there always, reminding me of how far I've come, how far I have to go, and that this race - and every race I run - is mine, and I should run it accordingly.

Do you have, or would you get, a tattoo? 
Is it running-related?

ABK