The Squat Challenge Ends

My squat challenge has come to an anticlimactic end. By the time I reached the last five days, I was so ready to be done. I was just tired of doing them.

I'm looking forward to cutting way back on quantity and adding some weights and lunges to the mix.

I had hoped to see physical changes in my quads, specifically more definition and preferably a more compact, harder muscle. I don't really see any of that.

Before

Strength-wise, though, I did see some great changes. My legs feel powerful. They're holding up under faster paces for longer distances (all things being relative, of course). I was really happy with those outcomes, even if I was disappointed in the lack of physical change.

After

It was fun to complete this challenge - it was the first time in ages that I've set a goal like this and seen it through to the end, so the mental aspect of the achievement was pretty cool. It also felt good to do some kind of exercise daily, even if all I did was squats. But, like I said...I am so burned out and ready for a change!

ABK

Tattoo Number Two

This weekend, Matt and I drove to the southeast coast to get my tattoo. If you recall, I wrote about wanting to get my second tattoo while in Fort Lauderdale for the A1A 5k. I ended up meeting my artist and putting down my deposit, but it was too short-notice to actually get anything done at that time.

That weekend, I emailed Phil some sketches I liked and he took some time designing an original tattoo based on those ideas. The final concept was gorgeous and everything I wanted. We set my appointment for 3pm on March 18.

These photos are what I sent Phil.

So, on Sunday I found myself at Into the Woods ready to go. The entire tattoo took about six hours including breaks, so we were there pretty much all night. It was worth it, though, for the detail and perfectionism Phil put into this piece.

After being in this position for basically 5.5 hours, I did my squats to loosen up haha!

Like with my back tattoo, the outlines didn't bother me much. There were a couple areas close to my armpit, inner arm, and the very back of my arm that were more sensitive, but generally I did well with this kind of pain. It just feels like scratching. It does get a little tedious after a few hours of it, but that's to be expected!

Lines done, starting the background.

After the outline was done, Phil worked on shading the background. I have never had shading done before and it was definitely uncomfortable. Where line-work feels like scratching, the shading felt like burning. Again, though: worth it. He was meticulous in creating a gradual fade in the background, and the edges are a little feathered and soft. He added some spot details that give the illusion of ash rising around the phoenix, as I did not want literal flames.

When we first discussed the piece, the background was the part I was unsure about getting, and it may be my favorite part of the finished piece.

Lines and background done!

At this point, we had been at it for a few hours and I had the option to stop and come back some other time to finish. I loved the way the half-done tattoo looked and played around with the idea of keeping it this way. But, Matt and I agreed that 1) we should trust the artist because he knows what he's doing and 2) if I'm going to get more done, I may as well do it while were there already. I was holding up fine under the pain of the needles; the worst pain was actually in my hips and legs from lying on my side for so long!

Phil mentioned that I sat better than 90% of his other clients. I think people are impressed that we did this all in one sitting, but really the pain never went above a 7, I think!

Phil really loves working with color, and at one point he was like, "You're killing me doing this in black and gray!"

My biggest concern with shading is that I don't like when tattoos look too dark and take on a muddy, flat look. Phil assured me he understood my concerns and that were would be lots of dimension and highlights.

Phil went to work on shading the grass, daffodils, feathers, and phoenix. There were some parts of the process where I worried the piece was getting too dark, but this is why I'm not an artist. By the time he put in the finishing touches - including white highlights around various feathers - the tattoo looked anything but dark and flat.

The finished piece.

I was blown away.

Now I have to deal with the next couple weeks of healing, but so far everything has felt fine. I feel, like I did with my first tattoo, that it was a part of me long before it physically made it onto my skin, so it feels natural and like it truly belongs there.

I love how it looks!

Obviously there are so many reasons to choose the theme of rebirth for a tattoo. While my first one had a pretty literal meaning for me, this one has a variety of memories and emotions wrapped up in it. I love how delicate the flowers are and how powerful the phoenix's face is. The juxtaposition of softness and beauty with the power and strength of the bird is exactly what I wanted.

I can't wait to see how it looks as it heals completely!

ABK

A Good Balance: Solo vs. Buddy Workouts

I few months ago, when I was still laid up and hadn't been cleared to run, I spent a lot of time thinking about how I wanted my fitness journey to look once I came back. I knew I wanted to focus more on my own fitness goals and also have the freedom to do whatever workout or run struck my fancy whenever the whim hit. I wanted the freedom to make my own schedule again.

But, I'm a coward and was scared to give voice to this because a major part of having more independence in fitness meant letting Elizabeth down. She has been such an amazing support through this entire process, and she's my bff. I felt terrible telling her that I wanted to be able to focus on what I want and what my body wants. I felt bad telling her that I didn't want to run every run with her.

Of course, Elizabeth is amazing and knows me way too well. Back in January, before my first run back, she texted me this:

Apparently I am incredibly transparent and she reads me like a book.

And I legit almost started crying because why is she so good to me?!

Later that month, we went to the gym and I told her that I had done a lot of thinking and wanted to be able to work out together two or three times a week, but that I also needed to have days when I could workout alone. She was really receptive to this (of course!) and we kind of discussed what that might look like. That's why my runs lately have been a nice mixture of alone/with Matt/with Elizabeth. It's been perfect.

Solo runs give me a chance to focus on my body and how things are going, get some alone-time, listen to music, and do whatever I want. They are incredibly important to me, and I appreciate them more than ever now.

Running with Matt offers a lot of the same, because we rarely talk during runs or even run side-by-side, but it also gives me a nice support system when I'm feeling uncertain or self-conscious. Plus, we're both so busy lately that running together gives us some good couple-time.

Matt's photography skills (and his willingness to be my own personal paparazzi) are an added bonus to running with him.

Running with Elizabeth gives us both some much-needed socialization during the week as well as motivation and accountability. I don't ever want to give that up completely; I just needed to cut back.

I started coaching track and field in February, but once my schedule clears up a bit, this is what workouts will probably look like:

I hope to be back to running 3-4 times a week by mid-April.

I know this schedule will remain flexible - none of these plans are set in stone - and I told Elizabeth I'd help her get out the door to run on her own on days I don't go with her to help her stay motivated.

This whole thing had been a big source of stress for me because I overthink everything and didn't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but now that I know I'll have plenty of alone time mixed in with buddy-time, I feel so much better. Already I've seen that my workouts have really benefited from having the freedom to do my own thing, and now I feel much more comfortable telling Elizabeth or Matt that I want to run alone.

I am looking forward to every workout these days; everything feels new and exciting again. I hope this excitement lasts, and when it inevitably begins to fade, I hope the memory of a year of nothing and how awful that felt helps give me a kick in the pants!

ABK