Monday, February 11, 2019

It's Race Week!

It's here!

This race is all that's been on my mind for months...and if I want to be really honest, it's all that's been on my mind for a year or more. After my first fasciotomy in August 2017, I knew I'd love to run it as my first long distance race post-surgeries. When I learned I may not be able to due to scheduling conflicts, I was devastated.

That changed in October, when I found out I could run A1A after all. I've had a one-track mind since then!
I don't want to talk about goals. Goals aren't even on my radar, honestly. My perspective on running and racing has shifted dramatically since my CECS diagnosis, and my priorities are completely different these days. That will surely change with time, but for now, my goals aren't exactly quantifiable.

I wrote about that on Instagram last week:




Let’s talk goals 🏃🏻‍♀️ . Too often, goals become arbitrary. We lose sight of why we’ve set a goal, and why we’re busting our butts for weeks on end to achieve said goal. I have been so guilty of that. . Not this time. My goal for A1A (which is a measly 13 days away!) is all about the experience. I’m better trained for this race than I’ve been for any half I’ve run before, but time and performance are at the bottom of my priorities list. . After a year of injury and another year of recovery, my goal for this race is to run it like the victory lap it is. Training has shown me that I am healed. That my perseverance and positivity have survived two years of setbacks. That I AM still a runner. That I still love this sport. That it still brings me joy and peace and strength and empowerment. That everything was worth it. . . My goal for this race is to finish smiling, even if it’s through (happy) tears.
A post shared by Ali (@abk_runs) on
No, this post isn't about goals. It's about anxiety. It's about typical post-training worry and pre-race jitters.

When I originally wrote my training plan, I kept my long runs really conservative and didn't plan a double-digit run until late January. Because of this, I had 12 miles planned the weekend before race day. Those 12 miles were planned more for mental support than physical need.

Cut to Sunday morning, when I ran my last long run of training. I only did 8 miles, instead of the prescribed 12. My legs were so tired the entire run, I knew cutting it down was the smart thing to do. Being able to keep a steady pace the entire run despite my tired legs gave me a mental boost.
The fact remains, although I did longer long-runs earlier in training than originally planned, I never ran longer than 10.5 miles...and now I'm regretting it.

I know I can run a solid half on the training I've put in. I'm pretty sure I'm better trained for this half than I've ever been before, at least as far as consistency and total mileage goes. It's also not my first rodeo - I know what to expect miles 10-13.1 to feel like. I don't have a time goal, but I don't want to be miserable out there on the course.

My logical-brain feels prepared and excited. My neurotic-brain is wringing its hands and wondering why we didn't do 12 last weekend.

Well. Nothing I can do about it now, right?! Other than talk it out and move on...so that's what I'm doing.

This week I have a couple short runs planned that I'm going to cut even shorter (based on leg-feel today) and then...it's race day next Sunday! I can't wait!

ABK

ETA: I have a virus of some kind and am on prednisone starting Monday, so it's a good thing I don't have a time goal, huh?

4 comments:

  1. Welcome to the world of post-surgery angst! If you finish this race CRAWLING, you will still have met your goal! Accept the stressed feeling, and run anyway <3

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    1. " Accept the stressed feeling, and run anyway <3"

      Good advice!

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  2. Go get 'em Ali! I understand the anxiety. Unfortunately, it's part of the process for some of us! You will get through it and have an awesome race, I know it!

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    1. I just hope the anxiety transforms into energy on race day!

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